Many times we come across situations where people blame each
other….
- You spoilt everything.
- You didn’t take enough care of me.
- You are wrong Or It’s your mistake.
- This is not how you should be handling the situation.
- You didn’t give me back the way I gave you.
- Etc…
Well such conversations would obviously take place among
people who are or were bound by some sort of love and expectations or otherwise
who cares about the uncos. What I wonder is how can one person be
consistently wrong and be held responsible unless he really wants to mess the
situation OR is incapable of understanding his inaccuracy. In latter case he
shouldn't be blamed, it’s not his fault, trust me. I have met a bunch of people
who are really incapable of understanding many things, forget their own
mistakes. Not everyone is cursed with an
exceptional EQ and who can we blame that for. The worst is you have to live
with them; so better accept and deal with it.
For the former case, why would one want to spoil everything
that too deliberately? Even if so, there must be some reason, the other person
too might have been hurt and wouldn’t be happily doing it. For I know no sane
man who would sabotage something he invested so much in, in the first place. The
whole point I am trying to make is it’s disgusting & useless to tell
someone they are wrong – “repeatedly”. If
you whine about the same thing and they keep repeating I believe either the
message is not being conveyed or you failed to find out what prompted them to? Are you clean in every sense, have you changed
your ways? Coz every confrontation when resolved demands a change from both the
sides, isn't it? Not in the same proportion may be…!
Accusing people might free you of your part but it will
never bring peace which we all are seeking ultimately. Why not do something
that the person himself realizes; I mean when words fail may be the actions
work.
This blame game might appear completely fine to some and to
me too if it’s limited to a fit of rage. But the second time you throw that
shit on me you are dead. Just because I don’t blame you for anything, who the
hell you are to do that to me… Is this too a blame asking not to blame... may
be … OMG… this is endless… …!
The point is to understand the other side, get into other
person’s shoes, walk a while and see what were they going through, their
limitations and their courage and does your sermon aggravated or mitigated their
miseries. Belief that the other person is doing to the best of his abilities might
save many a relationships.
People who take responsibility of all that happens to them are
such a rare breed; respect and condolence!!
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