Many times we come across situations where people blame each other….
- You spoilt everything.
- You didn’t take enough care of me.
- You are wrong Or It’s your mistake.
- This is not how you should be handling the situation.
- You didn’t give me back the way I gave you.
Well such conversations would obviously take place among people who are or were bound by some sort of love and expectations or otherwise who cares about the uncos. What I wonder is how can one person be consistently wrong and be held responsible unless he really wants to mess the situation OR is incapable of understanding his inaccuracy. In latter case he shouldn't be blamed, it’s not his fault, trust me. I have met a bunch of people who are really incapable of understanding many things, forget their own mistakes. Not everyone is cursed with an exceptional EQ and who can we blame that for. The worst is you have to live with them; so better accept and deal with it.
For the former case, why would one want to spoil everything that too deliberately? Even if so, there must be some reason, the other person too might have been hurt and wouldn’t be happily doing it. For I know no sane man who would sabotage something he invested so much in, in the first place. The whole point I am trying to make is it’s disgusting & useless to tell someone they are wrong – “repeatedly”. If you whine about the same thing and they keep repeating I believe either the message is not being conveyed or you failed to find out what prompted them to? Are you clean in every sense, have you changed your ways? Coz every confrontation when resolved demands a change from both the sides, isn't it? Not in the same proportion may be…!
Accusing people might free you of your part but it will never bring peace which we all are seeking ultimately. Why not do something that the person himself realizes; I mean when words fail may be the actions work.
This blame game might appear completely fine to some and to me too if it’s limited to a fit of rage. But the second time you throw that shit on me you are dead. Just because I don’t blame you for anything, who the hell you are to do that to me… Is this too a blame asking not to blame... may be … OMG… this is endless… …!
The point is to understand the other side, get into other person’s shoes, walk a while and see what were they going through, their limitations and their courage and does your sermon aggravated or mitigated their miseries. Belief that the other person is doing to the best of his abilities might save many a relationships.
People who take responsibility of all that happens to them are such a rare breed; respect and condolence!!